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Sunday, March 13, 2011
Meaning.

What is the meaning of life?

Is there any?

2 voices

Friday, March 04, 2011
Entitlement

We are the products of our society.
We are the results of our environment.
We are what society shapes us to be, what our education molds us into.
We are not as in control of our lives as we think we are.

If all our lives we've known a door as a door, and a window as a window, would we have ever thought about breaking down the walls? Or even, climbing through the ceilings? Or lift up the tiles? We are the product of our inbred biases, our internal choices.

I am a victim of my own education. An unknowing sufferer of rules that I have never consciously paid attention to, but has wholeheartedly obeyed subconsciously.





0 voices

Friday, November 26, 2010
Occasions

There are many ways to it, our expression of emotions that momentary engulf us, and each of us, within ourselves there is that one path which we use to express it. Some, force it onto themselves, compressing it believing that they can take it, and it is their fate and they are meant to endure such emotions. Some scream and yell, letting it all out for the world to see.

Perhaps this is how, I choose to express my emotions. By withdrawal. By running away. I don't think it's right either, but perhaps this was how I've trained myself to react against things that go against my will, instead of how I used to just blow up in front of everything.

Perhaps why this is making me feel so miserable, is because it makes me feel inadequate, and as a result I strive to exceed myself

0 voices

Saturday, November 20, 2010
ranting

It's a Friday's night, and I'm leaving for home. It rained and thundered a while back, but when I got to my car the wet weather was at it's last laps, dwindling down to mere occasional droplets on the windscreen.

I love how everything is after the rain. The lights are clearer, the buildings sharper, and the air feels just about right. Driving home, soothes the soul somewhat. There's a calmness to it, there's a weird warmth of heading home, the one place where the externalities of life are exactly that, mere externalities, easily discarded in the place where one releases their internal energies.

Lately my journey home has been accompanied by slow music. I've never asked myself why, but I think it needs no explanation. Music, like art, is something you just identify it at a subconscious, subliminal level. Slow music set against the night lights and tall buildings, over time, evokes a kind of sadness, or more appropriately, a kind of aged, jaded bitterness about life, like someone who's lost everything, and has come to terms with the fact.



0 voices

Saturday, June 26, 2010
cleanup1

Unless you have increasingly more space, the old must make way, for the new to take place.

0 voices

Sunday, February 21, 2010
Musically inclined

Music feels better when you're out to enjoy them with your heart.

0 voices

Thursday, February 18, 2010
Between god and a little while more

Change, is scary.
One moment we're here, the next we're on a journey to a place a thousand miles away.

I've recently watched "Up in the air", acted by George Clooney.
Strangely, I somehow wish I can end up like that, feeling most at home being on the road.

0 voices

Sunday, January 24, 2010
One lesson

One lesson I feel our generation needs to really learn, is to be able to confront suffering, and accepting them as part of the cycles of life. Constant avoidance of suffering, perhaps temporary comforting, is merely a postponement of suffering.

Above all, I hope I myself can understand it, practice it, and embed it within myself, that suffering is something that we must all go through to be who we want to be.

Yet it's still so hard.

Uh.

2 voices

Saturday, January 02, 2010
Beginning with a bit of appreciation

Let's begin the year with a bit of appreciation :D

Every now and then news gets to you, that says hey, 'so-and-so is making RMx,xxx', or so and so is working in singapore/australia/new zealand making aud21/hour and works 3 days a week only! At first, I'm jealous. After all, the money is very good, and tempting. In all sincerity I contemplated, and I considered the options that are available.

Or perhaps that entrepreneurial friend that gets talked about during gatherings about how successful and well off he is now. And again, I think, I wonder, and I imagine.

And yet I made no action.

I've asked myself why a few times. Inaction? Laziness? Often I just shrug the matter of as a passing fad, a desire to keep up that's probably irrelevant. Lately though, as those news gets more frequent, that envious voice gets stronger, and I can no longer ignore it with a simple statement that holds no water.

I had to sit, and really think why I'm not doing anything. That envious voice needs to be silenced with a strong dose of logic and reason.

And this, is what I came up with.

For all the complaints I have about work (and there aren't much), fundamentally I like my job. I've grown attached to the flexibility and the times when y0u get to go off on long breaks. Heck, even the peak is actually quite exciting because there's a kind of adrenaline rush to having a deadline, and a sense of accomplishment when we achieve things.

Then there's the social aspect. I like having friends that I can easily hang out with, and the sense of belonging. It's something that endears one to whatever he is doing. Point is, am I happy? If I am, there is no point leaving. Money can't buy happiness and satisfaction, and if I'm satisfied and happy, I don't need the money. And so I stay. True, I believe they'll be a point when I will need to do something, but now, in this period of time, I'm staying put. =D

There is no point for me to make such a big jump for a difference I don't need.

2 voices

Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Meh

Generally I like the cyclical nature of audit, but it's the non-audit matters that really breaks it for me.

I know I hate it, but there are things I feel are my duty which I will do out of my sense of responsibility. Then there's audit.

I hate the fact that peak is during chinese new year. I hate the fact that peak is during the 'qing ming' festival. I hate the fact that so many events involving family that happen during peak, and it sucks, because I don't like to have to choose and make such decisions that I feel like I lose either way.

Fark audit.

0 voices

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